Sacrifice
by Lux-soap
Summary: Hermione will sacrifice anything to keep her relationship with Krum a secret... even the one thing no one should be forced to give up.
1. Default Chapter

Sacrifice  
  
Summary: Hermione will sacrifice anything to keep her relationship a secret. Even the one thing thing no one should be forced to give up.  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own ANY characters from Harry Potter (because if I did, I'd be working on the 6th nook right now, not writing fanfiction.) Only the plot is mine, so don't sue me!  
  
Note to everyone This is my first fanfiction everyone, so I'm sorry if its real crap. Anyway, read it and review to tell me what you think! I hope you enjoy it.  
  
Rating: G (but could get to R13 in later chapters.)  
  
**************************************************************************** ********************************** Living a lie. It's a hard life. It all began one day when I was sitting inside the Gryffindor common room, with my two best friends Ron and Harry, doing our homework as usual, and all of a sudden, Harry asked me a question that made my heart pound really fast. "Are you going out with that Krum guy?"  
  
Now, I didn't know why I just could not answer him straight. It was an easy question, and deserved a simple answer. Of course, the answer was yes, so I don't why I just couldn't say that. Was it because all of a sudden, Ron almost fell of his chair looking at me so anxiously, or was it because I just couldn't bear it being out in the open. That I was going out with a death eater. (of course Viktor didn't know that I was born to muggle parents. He somehow got the idea that I was a pure-blood, and I didn't want to disappoint him, so I just didn't correct him.)  
  
Anyway, this was only the start of lying to Harry and Ron. I felt so bad about it, and I just couldn't help it, but I was so ashamed. I was so confused about all my feelings. Sometimes I think to myself, why do I even like him? After all, he is a deatheater! How could I possibly like someone that if they knew where I really come from, would want to kill me! And other times, I think to myself, no, I can change him. He's a good person, it's just that he has fallen in with the wrong crowd and he's got some stupid ideas stuck in his head.  
  
It was so easy lying to Harry and Ron and Ginny (who seemed to be getting suspicious about why I write so many "random" letters to random people) when Viktor lived so far away, but when he got transferred into the English qudditch team, that's when problems started arising. Somehow, he managed to make various visits to Hogwarts on random occasions (to see me of course) so we had to arrange to meet in secret. Hagrid's hut was pretty good most of the time, what with him being in Azkaban, and with the new head- mistress, sneaking out his house was not at all a problem. I've got her wrapped around my little finger!  
  
The only difficulty of course, was Harry. On most nights', he was the only one left studying in the common room until midnight. (He's got his heart set on being a auror.) And he was never satisfied with my story of "Oh, just going for a walk" when he asked me where I was going. I think he has been really worried about my grades have been slipping recently, but honestly, he is such a worry wart! Who cares if I no longer get 140% in all my tests. 98% was good enough for me! And anyway, who ever cared about school when you have found your perfect wizard?  
  
But other than Harry worrying aimlessly about me, Rons' weird looks and Ginnys' awkward questions, everything was running more and more smoothly, and I thought I was beginning to fall in love with Viktor. I thought my life was perfect. But that was until that wretched Malfoy stopped me in the hallway, on my way to potions.  
  
"I hear you're in love, Granger." "What?" I replied. I stopped dead in my tracks. He knows something. He has to. What else could he have meant by that? "What do you mean?" I questioned. "If I were you, I'd be a little more careful about the lies I tell, Mudblood. Especially where "love" is involved!"  
  
I couldn't help it. I took off down the corridor crying. He knew about Viktor. I haven't told anyone, so it must have been Viktor then. Oh no, I totally forgot! The Malfoys' are deatheaters as well, maybe they're friends or something. Oh no, what am I going to do?  
  
I walked up into my dorm room and started pacing up and down. Who cares if I was missing out on Potions. I could deal with Snape later. What if Viktor finds out who (or what) I really am? He'll kill me. (literally.) Maybe I should send him an owl or something asking if he knows the Malfoys'.  
  
I really needed to think, so I decided to go to the library. Books always have the answers, even if Viktor does say they're a waste of time. "Harry, hi!" Crap, I forgot he would probably be here. "Hi ya Herm, how come you didn't turn up to potions. Snapes' pretty mad. Malfoy was mentioning something about how you're in love or something, but that won't last for long and stuff. I didn't have a clue what he was talking about." "Oh no." I exclaimed, "Where's Malfoy now?" "Um, you expect me to know?" "I have to talk to him." I grabbed my stuff and took off, leaving a very confused Harry sitting by his lonesome.  
  
After minutes and minutes of searching, I finally found him, surrounded by his two usual sidekicks, Crabbe and Goyle. "Malfoy, I mean, Draco. Hi, I need to talk to you." "Sorry Mudblood, I don't talk to scum like you, and I don't think your little boyfriend would either, if he knew what you were." "Please Malfoy, don't tell him. I beg you, I'll do anything!" "Anything." "Yes, absolutely anything?" He started to smile. "Of course, anything you ask. You name, it, I'll do it!" "Well, we're in our 7th year, and I am still a virgin you know."  
  
A/N Thank-you so much for choosing to read my story! I hope you all liked it! Please please please review! It would mean so much to me if you did! 


	2. Decisions

Decisions  
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter and co. or the Britney Spears' song.  
Note: Ok, this is my first fanfiction, and for some crazy reason, I decided  
to add a song in, so I hope its ok and that everyone likes it. This whole  
chapter is written in the perspective of Hermione. Oh, and thanks to all my  
lovely reviewers: StickyElf, VeriaMatnn, hpfan87, Ratty, Brandonluvr,  
Jales992 and houdinishideaway Sorry I couldn't update sooner, but what with  
exams and all.  
**********  
I can't believe it. Is Draco asking me to do what I think he is? What the  
hell am I going to do.  
  
I used to think  
I had the answers to everything,  
  
"Granger, stop staring at me. So, are you going to do it, or do I have to  
tell Krumy-wumy your little secret?"  
"I, I don't know." I stammered. Crap, what is happening to me?  
  
But now I know  
that life doesn't always go my way.  
  
"Well then, I better be off. I have got a whole heap of owls to send out  
now." A huge, evil smile broke out his face.  
  
Feels like I'm caught in the middle  
That's when I realize.  
  
"Wait, I'll do it. Meet me at Hagrids house at 11.30pm tonight. And bring  
some, some stuff."  
  
I'm not a girl  
Not yet a women.  
All I need is time  
A moment that is mine  
While I'm in between.  
I'm not a girl.  
  
What the hell did I just say? Why did I say that? I stormed back up to the  
Gryfindor common room with tears in my eyes. I plunged down into my usual  
seat, disappointed not to see Harry.If I told him everything, he would know  
what to do.  
What was happening to me? Do I really love Viktor that much? As much as to  
sacrifice my virginity to the one guy I truly hate? How could this be  
happening to me? Last year, my life was perfect. I was a prefect, Viktor  
and I were just friends so there was nothing to worry about and..  
"Hey Hermione, wake up. Where have you been?" Ron asked. "And how come you  
weren't in Potions? I have been trying to find you everywhere! I need help  
with my homework."  
Oh no. He did just not help me for help with his homework, did he? How  
bloody selfish! As if I don't have better things to worry about!  
"Hermione? Um, is anything wrong? Why are you looking at me like that?"  
OOPS, he knows something is wrong. Better put on my sweet, goody-two shoes  
act on, or he might get annoying.  
"I'm sorry, nothing is wrong. I just, just don't feel well. I think I need  
a nap. Hey, if you see harry, can you tell him I need to talk to him. Get  
Ginny to come and get me, when he is free. OK?"  
  
It's time that I  
Learn to face up to things on my own  
  
I went upstairs to my room, and started crying. I was only 17. I didn't  
want to do it with Draco. The thought makes me want to barf! But I knew I  
had to. It was choosing between Viktor finding out who I was, and sleeping  
with Draco. It should have been an easy decision. Why why why did I have to  
lie to Viktor in the first place? If he finds out I am born to muggle  
parents, then he'll kill me. But if I sleep with Malfoy then, then. then it  
probably wouldn't be so bad, I guess. I was probably just blowing this  
whole thing out of proportion.  
  
I've seen so much more than you know,  
Don't tell me to shut my eyes  
  
I mean, I was doing it in the name of love. Yeah, I was, so what am I  
worrying about? I got back out of bed and marched down the stairs seeing a  
new light. Hey, in 5 years, I will probably look back at this and laugh!  
  
I'm not a girl  
Not yet a woman  
  
"Hey Herm. Ron said you wanted to talk to me?" Harry said.  
"Oh. that. Hey listen, it was nothing. I just wanted to, to copy your  
potion notes, but I'll get them off you later I suppose." Phew, luckily I  
thought of something quickly, because I decided it would not be the perfect  
time to tell Harry about this.  
"Are you sure that's it? Because Ron said you were acting kinda, kinda  
funny."  
"Oh, you know Ron." I replied. "He was probably just being over dramatic as  
usual. Hey, lets go down to dinner."  
  
All I need is time  
A moment that is mine  
While I'm in between  
I'm not a girl  
  
We were sitting down at the table; Harry, Ron and I, when someone tapped me  
and whispered something gently into my ear.  
"You ready for tonight, sexy? Because it is gonna be big!"  
I turned around, knowing that it was Draco, but wanting to prove myself  
wrong.  
  
But if you look at me closely  
You will see it in my eyes  
This girl will always find her way  
  
He was gone. No one was there. Was I imaging things? I quickly shot a look  
down to the Slyrithin table, but he wasn't there. Great, so now I was  
loosing my mind. This isn't fair. I can't take it anymore. I'm going mad! I  
had to get out of here. I can't do this. Why did I tell him that I would?  
How stupid was I? Oh, I am so confused!  
  
I'm not a girl  
(I'm not a girl don't tell me what to believe)  
Not yet a woman  
(I'm just trying to find the woman in me)  
All I need is time  
(All I need is time)  
A moment that is mine  
While I'm in between  
I'm not a girl.  
  
After eating, we Ron and I went up to the common room while Harry went to  
the library. There was still no sign of Draco, and I was getting really  
nervous.  
"What is it with you Hermione? You haven't said anything all night!" Ron  
said.  
"Yeah, I'm just confused."  
  
I'm not a girl  
Not yet a woman  
  
We took our usual places next to the fireplace. Before I knew it, it was  
11pm.  
"I'm going to sleep now. Night Ron."  
"Goodnight. Sleep well." He replied.  
Yeah right! I walked up the stairs, leading to my room, still not decided  
about what I should do.  
  
All I need is time  
A moment that is mine  
While I'm in between.  
  
And before I knew it, my feet were leading me to Hagrids' hut. This was it.  
There was no turning back.  
  
I'm not a girl.  
  
A/N So. did everyone like it? I'm sorry if it was a bit confusing! Please  
review! Even if you thought it was crap. I have heaps of other chapters up  
my sleave, (which will go into more detail). Ok, review now! 


	3. Confused Feelings

Chapter 3: Confused Feelings  
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, Draco, Hermione blah blah blah. You  
know the story.  
Note: Thank so much to: VeriaAtann, Fleur, hpfan87, Darkfire22 and  
houdinishideaway for reviewing my story. I'm sorry about this, but I had to  
use another Britney Spears song (It fits in well.) But I promise this is  
the last time! Please Read and Review!  
*****  
I woke up and looked over at my alarm clock. Damn, it was 10.30am. I had  
missed half of transfiguration already. Oh well, I only got back from  
Hagrids' hut at around 3 this morning. I had done it. I was now, a woman!  
  
Say hello to the girl that I am  
You gonna have to see it through my perspective  
  
I knew that I really shouldn't have done anything with Draco, but I  
couldn't help. I had to, if I wanted to see Viktor again.  
  
I need to make mistakes just to learn who I am  
And I don't wanna be so damn protected  
  
I got dressed and grabbed my books and ran to class. I wasn't too worried  
about McGonagal, because I knew exactly how to get around her. I was more  
worried about what Draco would say, whenever I see him. I knocked on the  
door and entered.  
"Sorry Professor, I was feeling really sick so I slept in. But I think I'm  
up to coming to class now, so I can I please join?" I begged, with my false  
"goody - two - shoes" tone.  
"Sure. I do hope you're up to it. You are looking a bit paler this morning.  
Take a seat." She replied.  
I walked past an extremely tired looking Malfoy, and sat down next to Ron.  
"Are you better? What's wrong? I never knew you were sick! What happened?"  
He questioned.  
Oh my god, sometimes I feel so sorry for Ron. I mean, how dumb could you  
get?  
"Oh, I was feeling a bit sluggish this morning, but I'm all right now," I  
lied.  
"Oh, well. that's a relief!  
  
I kept sensing Draco's eyes on me. I could feel them looking at every curve  
my body owned. I felt like he was invisibly unwrapping all my clothes, and  
there was nothing I could do about it.  
  
There must be another way  
Because I believe in taking chances,  
But who am I to say  
What a girl is to do, god I need some answers  
  
Oh my god. That didn't just happen did it? Someone please tell me that when  
Malfoy winked at me, my heart did not just skip a beat. No, I must of been  
imagining things. Why would he wink at me? He doesn't like me. He is just  
using me.  
  
What am I to do to win my life  
(You are fine and I don't worry)  
How am I supposed to know what's right  
(You just gotta do it your way)  
  
But then, why did my heart skip a beat? What the hell is happening here?  
  
I can't help the way I feel  
But my life has been so overprotected.  
  
No, I love Viktor. I'm just letting my imagination run away with me as  
usual. He did not just wink at me, and I do not want him to. I love Viktor.  
That is why I did what I did last night. This is so crazy. I didn't even  
enjoy it last night. Well, not really. Besides, Malfoy hates me. Ok, I am  
not having this argument with myself. This is ridiculous!  
I could hear the bell ringing, marking the end of class. I got up slowly,  
trying to avoid all eye-contact with him, when he approached me.  
"So, been talking to your boyfriend lately?" He questioned slyly.  
"That's, that's none of your business." Stuttered. Why was I afraid of  
him? It doesn't make any sense!  
  
I tell them what I like, what I want, and what I don't  
But every time I do, I stand corrected  
  
"I think you're forgetting what I know."  
"No, please. I did what you wanted last night. What else do you want?"  
"Oh, you'll see! Meet me in the library at 5pm today. And come alone." And  
with that, he walked off. What could he possibly want with me in the  
library? And come alone? Why?  
  
Things that I've been told  
I can't believe what I hear about the world  
I realize I'm over-protected  
  
No way in hell was I going. I've had enough.  
  
There must be another way  
Coz I believe in taking chances  
But who am I to say  
What a girl is to do, god I need some answers  
  
I walked to my next class with Harry and Ron. I really wanted to tell Harry  
what was happening with Draco and Viktor, but stupid Ron was there, and he  
just wouldn't understand.  
  
What am I to do to win my life  
(You are fine and I don't worry)  
How am I supposed to know what's right  
(You just gotta do it your way)  
I can't help the way I feel  
But my life has been so overprotected  
  
Finally, when Ron walked off to go to the bathroom, I got a chance to talk  
to Harry.  
"Harry, I really need to tell you something." I said.  
"Oh, what is it?" He replied.  
"Well, it all started with." And I told him everything. In fact, we decided  
to skip Herbology just to talk.  
"I can't believe it." He kept saying. "That little prick. I'll kill him."  
(I couldn't tell who he was talking about. Viktor or Malfoy. After what  
felt like a long period of silence, he said something.  
"I've got a plan. I'll come with you to the library and you can tell him  
that you don't want to play his little games anymore. And if he tries  
anything, I'll be there to stop him."  
I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Harry was a real friend. I was so  
happy. We walked off to grab some lunch, and spent the rest of the day,  
both nervous and excited about what was to come.  
Finally, 5o'clock came. Harry and I walked off to the library together.  
  
I need time, I need space  
  
He was already there, and didn't look very happy to see us.  
"I thought I told you to come alone."  
"Shut up." I said. "I have had enough of you blackmailing me. I'm sick of  
you using me."  
  
I don't need nobody telling me what I wanna  
What I'm what, what, what I'm gonna do about my destiny  
Nobody's telling me just what I wanna do  
I'm just so fed up of people telling me to be  
Someone else but me.  
  
"What are you saying, freak? That you want me to tell Viktor?" He asked.  
"No," Harry cut in. "Because if you do, you will have me to deal with."  
"Oh, I'm so scared Potter!"  
"Yeah well, you will be by the time I'm finished with you." He said, and  
punched Malfoy in the ribs. We walked off laughing. I wish I told Harry  
ages ago about Viktor. I don't even care if Malfoy tells Viktor about me  
anymore. Harry will be able to finish him off.  
And we walked backed up to our common room in hysterics about Malfoys'  
facial expressions. It felt as though I was getting my life back on track!  
*********  
A/N So. you like? Sorry if this chapter wasn't that eventful, but I had to  
do this, before I can make anything else happen. So stay tuned for more! I  
won't be able to update for a week (because of exams) but after that, there  
will be heaps. Please review everyone, because I find them really helpful.  
If you have any ideas, feel free to let me know! Ok, now review all you  
good people! 


	4. The Journal Entry

Chapter 4 - The Journal Entry  
Hi everyone, thanks for choosing to read my story. I hope you all liked it  
so far! This chapter is a little different because is an extract of what  
Draco has written in his journal. (yes, he has a journal!) Also, this is  
way shorter than the other chapters, but if I wrote anymore, it would ruin  
the plot for my next chapters! Anyway, thanks so much to: Number 1 Princess  
for being so truthful, houdinishideaway for liking my story, hpfan97 for  
also liking my story, darkfire22 for being cool, and of course VeriaMatann  
for inspiring me to write fanfiction. You have all been so kind and oh so  
helpful! If you guys don't like my story, can please tell me, because my  
last chapter didn't seem to get that many reviews, and I was just wondering  
why! Anyway, I hope you enjoy the story.  
Disclaimer: I do not own Draco, Hermione or Harry Potter. A genius who I  
like to call J.K Rowling does!  
*******  
Hey Journal,  
I can't believe that that little freak and Potter had the nerve to punch me  
in the ribs. I am so pissed off at them. I know what I'm doing to Hermione  
is wrong, but there is just no other way of being with her. I mean, she  
hates me so much that she would never go out with me, even if I did the  
right thing. So I am blackmailing her. It all make sense really. Her  
boyfriend just happens to be staying with my family, and he thinks that  
Hermione is a pure blood. I told Hermione that if he finds out that she is  
a mud-blood, then he would kill her. So now, she has to do whatever I  
wanted for me not to tell him. Little did she know that that dumb-ass  
Viktor "loves" her so much, that he would probably give up being a  
deatheater for her. But then, so would I.  
Last night, I forced her into doing it with me. It was so good. It felt  
like we were a couple for a little while. I could tell she enjoyed it,  
diary. I know she did! That's why she didn't leave for so long. I mean, she  
could have left straight afterwards, but she didn't, did she? No, she chose  
to stay with me for another hour or so.  
I don't know why she had to go and tell the bloody Potter though. He is  
going to ruin everything. He already has. I wouldn't worry though. I always  
get what I want. Always.  
I have a plan anyway. First, I will have to threaten her again about me  
telling Viktor everything, when Potter isn't around. Then, I will have to  
try and get under her skin. You know what I mean? Like, try and make her do  
anything I want. I will make her think about me 24/7. Then soon, she should  
realize how cool I really am, and fall in love with me. It sounds crazy, I  
know. But it could just work. Besides, what have I got to lose? My dignity?  
Yeah right! Like I ever had any anyway.  
I will do anything to be with Hermione. I love everything about her. The  
fact that she's a mudblood makes her even more appealing. Anything to piss  
off father! Her gorgeous bushy hair, her hazel eyes, her amazing body. Man,  
even just thinking about her makes me go all tingly. I don't even know what  
she sees' in Viktor anyway. He is so dumb! Hey, probably even dumber than  
all those stupid Weasley's joined together! Ok, maybe not that dumb. I am  
so much better than him. And Hermione will be noticing that very soon. Just  
give me two weeks, and I'll have her wrapped around my little finger!  
Anyway, gotta go Journal. I can hear Crabbe and Goyle coming up the stairs.  
Wouldn't want them to see I write to a journal. Not that anything is wrong  
with it. But they would probably think it's sissy.  
Later - Draco Malfoy  
A/N I hope everyone enjoyed it! Please, please, please review to let me  
know what you think! Next chapter will be up soon! 


	5. Playing the game of love

Chapter 5 - Playing the game of love  
  
A/N I would like to thank BooBooInkyClown17, hpfan87, Annskers,  
number1princess, br*tney, houdinishideaway and VeriaMatann for reviewing  
the last chapter. I would just like to remind everyone that this is my  
first fanfiction story, so please be nice! This chapter has also turned  
into another son fiction. I hope you enjoy it!  
  
Disclaimer I do not own any of the characters or ideas discovered by J.K.  
Rowling. Only the plot is mine, so please don't sue me! I also don't own  
Britney Spears' song: "Oops I  
did it again."  
*****  
  
Even though I was sitting in the common room in front of my two best  
friends, listening to ideas about future D.A meetings, my mind was  
elsewhere. I could not help but think about that night that was spent with  
Draco. There was something that I just could not figure out about him. I  
mean, he was so gentle with me. He treated me so well. He kept asking me  
whether I was OK, and if I wanted to back out and stuff. He was such being  
a big sweetie! He was so kind to me. I mean sure, he should have never  
asked me to do it in the first place. But still.  
  
Wait, why on earth was I thinking like this? What am I saying? The whole  
reason I did it with Malfoy in the first place was because I love Viktor.  
Oh my god, I feel so guilty. How could I possibly think these things about  
Malfoy? Even if it was just for a split second? I totally forgot about  
Viktor!  
  
"Hey 'Mione, are you coming? We are about to go to the dinner hall. Hey, I  
bet Malfoy wont show up! Don't think his ribs would have quite recovered  
yet!" Harry said.  
"Ha, yeah."  
  
For some crazy reason, I had to force a reply to Harry. What is happening  
to me? Why am I thinking like this? I mean, I should be happy that Harry  
bet the crap out of Malfoy. I hate Malfoy. I do, I really hate him. But  
then, if I really hated him that much, why was I trying to convince myself  
of this fact?  
  
We all arrived at dinner, and while I should of being filling my plate with  
the delicious food in front of me, I was squinting at the Slytherin table  
which was placed on the opposite end of the hall from me. I just couldn't  
see him. What if he wasn't all right? Maybe Harry punched him a little too  
hard. Oh no, it was all my fault. I couldn't possibly eat anything knowing  
that he might be in pain. I had to do it. I had to go and see him.  
  
"I've um, I've lost my appetite guys, so I'm just going to go up to my  
room. So I'll see you alter then?"  
"Hermione? Are you. but you ah, haven't eaten. You can't go." Harry said,  
squirming around uncomfortably in his chair. Oh no, I forgot that Harry  
knew about this whole thing with Draco. Maybe he thought Draco was trying  
to make me do something else with him.  
"Don't worry Harry, it's got nothing to do with, well, you know what." I  
looked over at a very confused Ron and said  
"I'm just, not hungry, I guess."  
  
After waiting outside the portrait in front of the Slytherin common room,  
he finally came out.  
"Hi. I mean, what are you doing here? Planning to brake any more of my  
ribs?" He nastily said.  
"No." I replied shocked. "I just wanted to um, make sure you were OK, I  
guess." All of a sudden, I felt really out of place. What was I doing here?  
I should be with Harry and Ron, not with Draco.  
"Really? I'm all right." The most beautiful smile broke out on his face.  
Not a mean, cunning smile, but a happy, cute one. I couldn't help it. I  
just had to tell him something.  
  
"Look, about this situation with Viktor. Do you want me to um, do anything  
else?" I questioned.  
"Well.now that you mention it. wait, are you trying to set me up again?  
Where's Potter? Why aren't you at dinner?"  
"Why aren't you in the hospital?"  
"Didn't feel the need to go. Look, are you trying to set me up again?"  
"No. I just... just don't want Viktor to find out about my parents."  
"OK, then come alone. Don't tell anyone, or else Viktor will be told about  
you. Meet me at the Hagrids' hut, and 11pm."  
"OK, fine." I swirled around and stalked off happily.  
  
(This next part takes place later on that night.)  
  
I placed my face upon Draco's masculine body. I could feel his heart  
pounding upon mine. This was so perfect. I wanted to stay like this  
forever. Even in the small amount of time I spent with him tonight, I felt  
so alive. Whenever I'm with Viktor, I am just my usual self, but with  
Draco, well, it really was something else. I wanted it to stay like this  
forever. I loved Viktor, but whenever I needed a bit more, you know, fun, I  
could go to Draco. We were just so peaceful together lying there, our  
bodies as one, until he gently spoke up  
  
"Hermione, I want to tell you something. I, I love you."  
  
Oh no, he didn't just say what I think he did, did he?  
  
I think I did it again  
  
I made you believe we're more than just friends  
  
Oh baby  
  
It might seem like a crush  
  
But it doesn't mean that I'm serious  
  
'Cause to lose all my senses  
  
That is just so typically me  
  
Oh baby, baby  
  
Oops!...I did it again  
  
I played with your heart, got lost in the game  
  
Oh baby, baby  
  
Oops!...You think I'm in love  
  
That I'm sent from above  
  
I'm not that innocent  
You see my problem is this  
  
I'm dreaming away  
  
Wishing that heroes, they truly exist  
  
I cry, watching the days  
  
Can't you see I'm a fool in so many ways  
  
But to lose all my senses  
  
That is just so typically me  
Oops!...I did it again to your heart  
  
Got lost in this game, oh baby  
  
Oops!...You think that I'm sent from above  
  
I'm not that innocent  
I had to get out of there. I didn't want to hurt him, but there was nothing  
else I could do.  
  
I ran and I ran with tears flooding my eyes. The last thing I wanted to do  
was to break Draco's heart. But if I told him how I felt. then god knows  
what would happen!  
  
(This happens the next morning.)  
  
"Are you OK? Where did you go last night?" Harry whispered to me.  
"Oh, I just need to think. You know, clear my mind." I lied.  
  
As the owl post swooped down below, I noticed I had received a letter as  
well as the usual Daily Prophet. I could recognize the handwriting straight  
away. I opened up the letter slowly.  
  
It read: To my darling Hermione, I haven't seen you in such a long time. I  
have missed you so much more than you can imagine. Please meet me in  
Hagrids hut at midnight. We have a lot of catching up to do. All my love,  
V.Krum.  
  
Oh no, how am I ever going to face him?  
******  
A/N So. did you all like it? I hope it wasn't too confusing. It didn't  
really turn out how I expected it to, but anyway, please tell me what you  
think! Can't wait to read your reviews! I'll update ASAP. - Lux-soap 


	6. Growing Suspicions

A/N This chapter is written in Viktor Krum's perspective. Thanks so much to  
VeriaMatann, darkfire22, number1princess and houdinishideaway, for  
reviewing. It is much appreciated. I hope you all enjoy this chapter!  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own anything to do with Harry Potter (except for this  
plot.)  
  
**************  
  
Chapter 6 - Growing Suspicions  
  
The night was growing dark and I decided it was better that I left from  
here straight away. I would never want to leave my Hermione waiting. I  
found my broom, grabbed my wand and took off. The cold wind swept passed my  
face as I rode high in the sky making sure no one saw me.  
  
I was so excited. I hadn't seen Hermione in such a long time. In fact, I  
hadn't seen her until I found out she was born to muggle parents. I can't  
believe she didn't tell me herself. I had to hear it from that spoilt  
little brat, Draco. Well, I suppose it doesn't matter. I just had to ignore  
that fact. I know I'm a deatheater and I hate mud-bloods, but for some  
reason, I could make an exception for Hermione. She was just so perfect!  
She never did anything wrong, she was always trying to help people and she  
was just so damn hot! I had never met anyone else like her. Not only was  
she smart, but sexy as well. Its unbelievable how much I love her. I would  
kill for her. All my friends on the England Quidditch team wonder why I  
even go out with her, when I could have any other witch in the world. They  
wouldn't understand love if it came up and bit them on the bum!  
  
I was getting closer to Hogwarts and I threw on my invisibility coat, and  
made my way towards the secret entrance. Thank god for Hermione finding it.  
Otherwise, I would never be able to get inside. I mounted off my broom and  
quietly made my way towards Hagrids hut. It wasn't quite midnight yet, but  
I decided to go in anyway. I unlocked the door with my bewitched key that  
opens all doors, and went inside to find something I would have never  
expected.  
  
His house was in a complete mess. I was positive that Hermione told me that  
his house was out of bounds to all students now that he was gone, so I was  
shocked that it was in such a state. I made my way to where the bedroom to  
find the sheets all ruffled. My curiosity was getting the better of me as I  
started to explore around. Clearly people had been in here after Hermione  
and I. Although I could still smell her strong fragrance. I was sure of it.  
I remember giving Hermione some perfume as a gift after our last visit. But  
that would mean? Wait, that would mean that she has been here after we met.  
No, it couldn't be. It was probably someone else's.  
  
I wanted to tidy up a little so I started to make the bed, when I found the  
most unusual thing. It was someone's bra. I knew it couldn't have been  
Hermione's because we have never done anything more than kiss, so it must  
have been someone else's. I turned around the lacy black bra to find that  
it was name H.Granger. No, there must be another explanation. Why would she  
be in here, with her bra removed? Not my baby.  
  
I decided to exit the bedroom and go into the main living area. It seemed  
as though someone had been in here as well, so I started to tidy up a  
little. Just as I was getting out my wand to whip up a cleaning up spell,  
Hermione walked in, looking better than ever.  
  
"Hi Hermione, I can't believe it! You look so different." I exclaimed.  
"Oh, don't you like it?" She questioned  
"No, I do. Hey you're wearing the perfume I bought for you. Is this the ah,  
first time you've worn it?"  
"Oh no. I love it! I wear it all the time."  
  
This should have made me happy. She likes my gift. But for some crazy  
reason, I kept thinking of how when I first walked in here, I could smell  
the same fragrance.  
  
She took my hand and lead me over to the table where we sat. I noticed she  
was looking a bit uncomfortable.  
"Is something bothering you sweetie?" I asked.  
"I love you so much," she replied as she plunged forward at me, and we  
started to kiss. It was such a long sweet kiss, that I had to pull back for  
some air. But she wouldn't let me. She came towards me again with a very  
flirtatious smile and massaged he tongue onto mine. I could feel her hands  
slowly unbuttoning my shirt and then dropping down, her hands siding  
underneath my boxers, when I had to pull back and ask:  
"Wow, Hermione, what brought this on? I thought you wanted us to go slow."  
  
I could tell straight away that I had said something to upset her.  
  
"I, I just love you so much Viktor." She said.  
"I wanted to remind you. That's all. I love you." She said.  
It almost felt like she was trying to reassure herself of this I could tell  
something was wrong. This didn't sound like her at all. I knew this wasn't  
the right time to ask, but I just had to bring it up:  
  
"Hermione, I found a black bra in Hagrid's' room with your name on it. Do  
you know anything about it?"  
  
A/N: So. what do you all think? I hope you like it. Sorry it's a bit short,  
but if I put anymore in, then there wouldn't be a cliffhanger. Anyway,  
please do review and tell me if you like/dislike it. If you have any ideas,  
please do let me know! Thanks for choosing to read my story, Lux-soap 


	7. Little White Lies

A/N This chapter is written in Hermione's point of view. Thanks so much to  
all my reviewers:  
houdinishideaway (I promise there's no Britney in this one!),  
hpfan87 (I hope you're feeling better!), hotaru420 (I'm glad you liked it),  
  
number1princess (the named bra gets explained on this one!),  
moony*padfoot (you're too kind!),  
sodapop C (you're very cool!),  
harryluvzginny (thanks so much),  
VeriaMatann (I made the bra black just for you!!),  
Ravengurlie149 (Thanks. I promise there is no Britney Speas in this  
chapter!)  
I am very grateful that the majority of you guys liked it! I hope you all  
enjoy this one as well!  
  
Disclaimer I don't own Harry, Hermione or any other characters from  
J.K.Rowling. Yada yada yada..  
  
Chapter 7 - Little White Lies  
  
As I was walking back from Hagrid's hut after meeting with Viktor, I  
couldn't believe how stupid I was. I mean, how could I have left my bra  
there after my little fling with Draco. I was just so stupid! The fault was  
my mothers though, as well. What in gods name is wrong with her? Why on  
earth does she have to go around and name all of my clothes for me? It's  
crazy. Oh well, at least Viktor is no longer suspicious about me anymore.  
Nothing that a couple of little white lies can't fix!  
  
I told him that there was another H. Granger at my school. It was my second  
cousin Helga, who I had never told him about because I was ashamed of her,  
as she was a complete little skank. I could explain about the perfume as  
well, because I had lent it to her the previous night. I was still a little  
scared that he was still not completely satisfied with my story, but it  
would do for now.  
  
I quietly sneaked back up to my dorm room and slipped into bed, reflecting  
on the nights events. I couldn't believe we had so much fun; Viktor and I,  
without doing anything much really. I was so nervous when I first got  
there. I mean, I had got all dressed up as though I was meeting Draco or  
something. I must have gotten confused. Anyway, I've got to remember now  
that Viktor doesn't love me for what I look like, but for who I am. Unlike  
Draco, who I am not sure why he "loves" me. Which reminds me. I had to go  
and sort some stuff out with him later.  
  
I can still remember how Draco said those three magical words to me: "I  
love you." Did he really mean them? And if so, why on earth did I take off  
like that? I felt so bad. He must be so hurt.  
  
**********  
  
I slowly dragged myself to breakfast looking utterly horrible. I had got  
back so late last night, that I couldn't even be bothered removing my  
makeup. My eyeliner was completely smudged and I was feeling really antsy  
this morning, so all my attempts at fixing it up had probably just made it  
worse. Anyhow, this was quite a good excuse for avoiding Draco again. I  
could only imagine facing him looking like this. He might have a heart  
attack!  
  
"What happened to you?" Questioned Ron as soon as I walked into the hall.  
  
Great, if Ron could notice that I looked like crap, then who couldn't? I  
don't know why, but lately I have just been getting frustrated with  
everything he seems to say. He is just so immature compared to guys like  
Harry, Draco and Viktor. Sometimes, I even felt like Neville had more of a  
clue than Ron.  
  
"Don't nag her mate. She probably just had a late night last night, aye?"  
Harry said, his eyes twinkling mischievously.  
  
Thank god for Harry. I don't know what I could have possibly done if it  
wasn't for him. What a good friend!  
  
My eyes led me to the Slytherin table, and I was shocked to see Draco  
sitting there away from his two trusty sidekicks, Crabbe and Goyle. In  
fact, he was completely on his own. I felt so sorry for him. Just sitting  
there all on his own, his adorable blonde hair unbrushed and his complexion  
so white, looking close to snow. I just had to go over and talk to him. But  
how could I? What, in front of all these people? No, it would only  
embarrass him further. I'll try and talk to him in Care of Magical  
Creatures, the only class I had with him today.  
  
****  
  
Finally fourth period had arrived and the butterflies were walloping around  
wildly in my stomach. As Hagrid wasn't there, and our relief teacher was  
completely and utterly stupid, I decided I would be able to make up some  
cock and bull story about Draco and I having to do some cleaning up.  
"Orders from the headmaster" I'd say. Hopefully Draco would get the hint  
and would play along, and then we could have some quality time together,  
and I would be able to explain everything, my feelings and all, to him.  
  
The relief teacher Mr. Wood had arrived, and I was eagerly awaiting a  
chance to bring up the little "cleaning duties" I had to complete.  
  
Finally, I had found the perfect moment. He was just going on about how  
"the forbidden forest was such a mess that he had lost his wand in it, the  
previous night," when I decided to bring it up:  
"Speaking of messes Sir, Headmaster Dumbledore requested that Draco Malfoy  
and I were to go to the kitchen and help with some of the cleaning up.  
They're short of house-elves, so we offered to help out." I said, with my  
sweetest possible voice and my most charming smile. I shot Draco a look, to  
try and read what he was thinking. He seemed to have caught on, and piped  
up:  
"Yeah, we better get a move on, we're already running late."  
To this, Mr. Wood replied: "Oh, well go ahead. You two really are model  
students you know!"  
  
Poor old Harry was looking very suspicious, but I would have to explain  
everything to him later. I am sure he would not approve of me cutting class  
to spend some time with him, but I had no other choice.  
  
When we were quite a while away from everyone else, I decided to start up  
the conversation.  
"Look Draco, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to leave you there that night, and  
run off like that." I said.  
"Oh, so what did you mean to do then?" He replied.  
  
I felt so bad. I could tell I had really hurt him. I didn't know he was so  
serious about me. I didn't know what to say. I guess I would just have to  
start with the truth.  
  
"Look, it came as a shock, that's all. I'm just really confused about,  
about how I feel."  
"That's OK. Do you still want to see each other though?"  
"Of course!." I replied. There was nothing else I rather wanted. I mean,  
Viktor is nice, but Draco really was something else. I really wanted to be  
with him right now. And I mean, like be with him.  
"Listen, do you want to go up to my room. No one will be there now, and it  
would be so perfect!" I told him. I could tell that he had forgiven me  
already. As soon as I said this, a huge smile lit up his face.  
"Of course!" He replied, and we walked back to my room, hand. It was all so  
perfect. I was so happy. I would never have it any other way!  
  
A/N So. what did everyone think? Please review, you know you want to! Stay  
tuned for tomorrow's adventure when we find out, would Hermione really not  
have it any other way? Oh, and also, anyone that liked my story, I think  
you should all go and read VeriaMatann's story "My Blazing Love for You."  
It is really good! Don't forget to review! I'll update ASAP, I promise! -  
Lux-soap 


	8. Guilty Conscience

A/N Thanks so much to sodapop c, moony*padfoot, Ratty, The Laguna, harryluvzginny (just wondering what bumpbump meant?), houdinishideaway, hpfan87, hotaru420, number1princess and annskers for all reviewing my last chapter. It means so much to me! This chapter is in the perspective of Hermione Granger (again.) But I promise that the next chapter will be another journal entry from Draco. I hope you all enjoy this chapter. (It is a little bit depressing.)  
  
Disclaimer Don't sue me, I don't own anything to do with Harry Potter, and I also don't own the song: Last Resort.  
  
Chapter 8 - Guilty Conscience  
  
Though I was sitting in the library next to Harry and in front of Ron, staring at "Hogwarts - A History," I was just not with it. My mind was once again, elsewhere. I couldn't help it, but instead of dreaming about my boyfriend Viktor, I was thinking of the boy with blonde hair, Draco. I felt so guilty. For more than one reason. Not only had I cheated on Viktor, but also lied Draco about falling for him. What has gotten into me lately? It didn't make sense. Why did I keep going back to Draco? It was like I was addicted to his love or something. I don't know, it just wasn't me at all. I have changed so much since last year. I can still remember how I used to a studious, innocent little girl. Where has that girl gone?  
  
I can still remember absolutely everything that happened with Draco yesterday. Every touch, every look, every giggle. Why was I enjoying this so much? This isn't right, it is disgusting. It is like I have turned into, oh what did those muggles at my old school used to call it? That's right, it is like I have turned into a slut.  
  
I most certainly do not want to be regarded as that type of person. I don't want to be "easy." I don't want to give Draco the greatest pleasures in the world. But there is nothing I can do. Whenever I am with him, all I can see it his masculine body, his amazing blue eyes, and of course, how big he is!  
  
See, I'm doing it again. Yuck, this is so gross. I can't think about these things. I should not be thinking about these things. This is just plain wrong.  
  
"Hermione, are you all right? You look like you're about to start crying or something." Ron said.  
  
I looked away. I could not bear to look directly into his soft, caring eyes. Lately I have been pushing him away, and I know that he does not deserve it, but for some reason, I just can not stop. I remember a couple of years ago, when I used to have a crush on him. I thought we would be so perfect for each other. But now I know that we just don't suit each other. I used fantasize about him all the time. Kind of like now, how I do about Draco. Wait, does that mean, is this thing that is happening with Draco, just a crush? Just a one night stand? (that went for a little more than one night?)  
  
"I am fine Ron, honest." I replied smiling at him, lying through my teeth.  
  
I had to get away from everyone. I went back up to my room, my mind full of concentration.  
  
I can not do this anymore. I am sick of lying to everyone. I am sick of cheating on Viktor. I am sick of thinking about Draco. I just needed to get out of here. I had to talk to someone, before I did something else really stupid, but there was no one to talk to. Harry would not understand how I could possibly feel about Draco, Ron is too, well, you know, he just would not understand, Ginny is much too young and my parents would totally freak out, if they found out all of the things I have been getting up to at school this year.  
  
I am all alone in this world, with no one to talk to. My life is a mess. What am I going to do? Is there really any point in me living? All I seem to do is cause trouble. I cheat on Viktor, Draco thinks I love him, I'm always lying to Harry and I practically can not even look Ron in the face. It is all my fault for making everyone's life hell.  
  
However I did bring this all on myself. What on earth did I have to start going out with Viktor for in the first place? When I found out he was a deatheater, why did I still have to like him? If I had never gone out with him, then this whole drama with Draco would not have happened. And if all of this never happened, then I probably would still be getting extremely high grades, and be getting along just fine with Ron. But no. I just had to fall for the bad guy, didn't I?  
  
Cut my life into pieces  
  
This is my last resort  
  
Suffocation  
  
No breathing  
  
Don't give a f*** if I cut my arm bleeding  
  
This is my last resort  
  
Cut my life into pieces  
  
I've reached my last resort  
  
Suffocation  
  
No breathing  
  
Don't give a f*** if I cut my arm bleeding  
  
Do you even care if I die bleeding  
  
Would it be wrong  
  
Would it be right  
  
If I took my life tonight  
  
Chances are that I might  
  
Mutilation outta sight  
  
And I'm contemplating suicide  
  
Cuz I'm losing my sight  
  
Losing my mind  
  
Wish somebody would tell me I'm fine  
  
Losing my sight  
  
Losing my mind  
  
Wish somebody would tell me I'm fine  
  
I lay down upon my four poster bed feeling like absolute crap. I really do not deserve to live anymore.  
  
A/N So, what do you think? I al totally fresh out of ideas so can you all please lend me some of yours? I am not too sure where this story is going, so if I don't update in awhile, blame writers block! Anyway, please all review and tell me what you think, and tell me if you have any suggestions. Thank you so much for reading this chapter. Remember, all reviews are welcome! Lux-soap 


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